A concept you often hear but rarely see practiced is work-life balance. People preach it, there might be a ted talk about it, but people struggle every day to achieve it. I don’t believe in work-life balance. Instead, I practice life-work balance. For me, nothing becomes before my life which is my wife, my family and then ultimately me. I don’t allow my work to dictate my actions, decisions, and mood. This is why I swap the words and put life before work because that’s how it should always be.

I will take a leap of faith and say that most people in the world are not selfish but selfless even though it’s hard to see at times. Unfortunately, this makes it hard for us to be selfish when we need to be. Hearing people in the workplace saying that they can’t afford to take time off or they have to be at work or I they have to work late might be the funniest statements made in the workplace. I know I am speaking from an extreme point of the word I hate now because everyone tosses it around but privilege. I completely understand some people literally can not afford not to work, they have to work overtime, but that’s not who I am talking about in this post. I’m talking about fully benefited 40 hours a work employees breaking their back at work. I have a couple of things for you, and hopefully, by the end of reading this, you take that deserved break from work.

First, what happens to your workplace when you are forced out of the office because you are sick. Do the wheels come off? Does the whole operation shut down and nobody works that day? What happens when you are not at work? You don’t have to tell me because I already know. It’s business as usual, for some of you reading this, your coworkers barely even notice you are not there. The thought of your workplace needing you is laughable because the harsh reality is it doesn’t. I’ve seen people quit, get fired, and the machine just kept on chugging along. The workplace doesn’t need you more than you need yourself. Practicing self-care and taking mental health days is a necessity in any field. I don’t care if you are a psychiatrist or flipping burgers. Work and life are taxing, and you need to take care of yourself. Going to work for the sake of going is more damaging to your health than it is productive for your work environment. I know this is a huge pill to swallow because our egos are so big. I work in education, and so many times early in my career I would use students as the excuse to drag myself into work when I was mentally drained or physically sick. I would say, “what will the students do if they come by and I’m not there?” The audacity of me to believe that I had that much control over a students life and it will crumble because I took a day off.

Secondly, you earned that vacation time so use it. Your employer can’t stop you from using it because it is yours. If they do raise hell, go to Human Resources, fight for your right to take time off. I often hear people feeling guilty when they are planning a vacation and cut it short because once again they think they need to be in the office. Don’t let the pressures of the job force you into not taking time to take care of yourself or be with the ones you love. No one benefits when you are not at your best. Vacation doesn’t mean spending money on an extravagant trip. Staying in bed all day not checking emails sounds like a perfect use of a vacation day to me.

Lastly, work will always be there, but you may not be. Working long hours to accomplish a little task such as clearing your inbox is not worth missing time to be with your family or doing something that you enjoy. Look I know there are the unavoidable task that arises at times that force us to work late but if you find yourself staying late every night, you have to check your priorities. Have you ever stayed late to accomplish everything on your to-do-list and when you got to work the next morning you had nothing to do? Maybe you have, and you just ruined the point I am trying to make but I will bet you haven’t and you know why? Work will always be there; there is always something that needs to be done or accomplished. Work never ends, and we spend most of our lives chasing assignments and task. Staying an hour or two after work to complete a task effectively accomplishes one thing, stealing your time and life away from the things that truly matter to you.

When was the last time you went out with friends? Visited family? Did something you enjoy? If you have to think about it, it has been far too long. Step away from just going through the motions in your life and live it. Think about how you can improve your life-work balance. For me, that means leaving work promptly to pick my wife up from work so that we can prepare dinner and recap our day together. Start with small goals such as leaving work on time three days this week. Or scheduling your lunch break, so you don’t work through it. I challenge you to put your life first. I love my job, but I love my life even more.